Fusion food – I’m on to you. Don’t think we haven’t noticed. If you were able to do one thing well, you wouldn’t have to invent yourself a distracting, sexy name. Preening for attention from well meaning and innocent diners, your flashy style masks your lack of substance.
Every time, it’s the same sneaky hustle. First you come on too strong with those sweet words promising luscious decadence. Full of potential and delight, a glance at what you offer starts off with words like “fresh king prawns” or “tender, juicy chicken”.
Then you make that inappropriate pass, a wrong turn towards Crazyville. A few minutes in and suddenly you’re all, “basted with a cilantro-fig-peppercorn chutney and accompanied with grilled beets. Served with a glass of buttermilk”. Sure, sometimes it’s the dill mayonnaise mashed potatoes, or the eggplant, avocado and raisin couscous. But I think you look ridiculous. Who decided you were such hot stuff?
1 comment:
I couldn't agree more. To make a fusion dish, all you have to do is take an elegant meal and bastardize it with the inappropriate use of avacados. Another strategy is to pervert seemingly innocent culinary terms like "relish" or "salsa" by preceding them with incongruous words like "blueberry" or "mint".
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